Dear Ms. Springs,
Regretfully I must inform you that your holiday gift, well intentioned though it was, attracted the attention of a certain dog named Rebel.
Rebel is already noted in the fandom for his precipitous consumption of vast quantities of candied walnuts - the ones that taste like Justin's ass. (
plumsuede, "Framed," 2005).
He appears to be branching out to non-fandom, non-food items, and felt that your reindeer-festooned, fragrant package, fresh from the wilds of Australia, was too intriguing to be resisted.
When apprehended, he stated, in his defense, that it smelled of kangaroo and koala and eucalyptus, and was quite quite irresistible.
Amazingly like you, Ms. Springs.
Rebel wanted you to know that he was quite disappointed to discover that the bubble baths were not, quite, as tasty asJustin's ass the candied walnuts, and thus he left them for me.
With warm regards during this holiday season,
Xie
Regretfully I must inform you that your holiday gift, well intentioned though it was, attracted the attention of a certain dog named Rebel.
Rebel is already noted in the fandom for his precipitous consumption of vast quantities of candied walnuts - the ones that taste like Justin's ass. (
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He appears to be branching out to non-fandom, non-food items, and felt that your reindeer-festooned, fragrant package, fresh from the wilds of Australia, was too intriguing to be resisted.
When apprehended, he stated, in his defense, that it smelled of kangaroo and koala and eucalyptus, and was quite quite irresistible.
Amazingly like you, Ms. Springs.
Rebel wanted you to know that he was quite disappointed to discover that the bubble baths were not, quite, as tasty as
With warm regards during this holiday season,
Xie
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